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Enjoying Mother’s Day After Divorce

Mother’s Day is often portrayed as another Hallmark occasion, with smiling, multi-generational, nuclear families celebrating their mothers with gifts of food, flowers and sometimes, lavish jewelry. That may not be your reality it’s not for many mothers I know but that doesn’t mean you should just ignore this occasion. Here are some suggestions for how to make sure you enjoy Mother’s Day after divorce . Being A Mom After Divorce Is Not Always Good Let’s acknowledge this. If you have minor children, divorce usually means that your children will not be with you 100 percent of the time and that’s a challenge. Even with the best, the most cooperative ex who is actively and positively involved in co-operating, not seeing your child every day can be gut-wrenching. Your responsibility as a mother is to be a good role model for your children, to show them that you are coping and adjusting to your new family situation and that you are supportive of their relationship with their o
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Helping women break free from domestic abuse.

We’re advocates of all victims of domestic violence. But today, we’re putting the needs of women in the spotlight. For you or for a woman in your life who you fear is trapped in an abusive relationship, here are some important reminders that you deserve safety and protection. You deserve to break free. You have the right to be safe . You don’t need to endure any form of abuse, whether it’s physical, sexual, emotional, or financial abuse. In 2018, it’s tragically still true that 1 in 3 women will encounter some form of partner violence in her lifetime. For your own protection, and to help women in your life who may experience abuse, learn how to file for a temporary restraining order. A court-ordered protective order prohibits your abuser from contacting you anywhere at home, at work, or on your phone. You have the right to keep your children safe . Women often stay in their abusive relationship because their abusers threaten to take their children from them, or threaten to

Moving on From Divorce: Why You Need to Stop Blaming Your Ex

When you’re in the throes of divorce, it’s easy to think of all the ways your ex has wronged you. It’s easy to blame him or her for the downfall of your marriage, as well as your current state of misery. But blaming your ex for messing up your life, as well as your children’s lives, won’t change the past — or the present.  The only thing blame will do is make you exponentially more miserable. Ready to let go and start moving on in 2018? Here’s how to take the first step.  Why Blaming Your Ex Keeps You From Moving On With Your Life Let’s say you believe your ex is a narcissist/deadbeat/terrible co-parent/thoroughly loathsome human being. He or she creates daily chaos in your life: he sends you copious hostile emails, she bad-mouths you to the kids, he hides income to reduce child support. The stress is taking a toll. You can’t sleep, can’t eat, struggle to pay bills, have panic attacks when you see his texts pop up on your phone, and find it hard to concentrate at work

5 Tips For Attending Parent-Teacher Conferences With Your Ex

Your first parent-teacher conference after separation or divorce can be unsettling. The event may bring back memories of happier times, and the excitement of raising young children together. It may be an unwelcome reminder that your family is no longer intact, and that your life hasn’t gone the way you expected. If you and your former spouse are so volatile that you have a hard time being in the same room, ask the teacher if you can have separate conferences. Some schools will not accommodate your request, however, so you will need to make the most of possibly attending with your former spouse. Here are five tips to make your first parent-teacher conference after divorce a success. Keep the focus on your child . The conference can heighten insecurities: What has the teacher heard about me? Why are all the other parents married? My ex’s new partner has no business being here! None of these concerns should occupy space in your head during the next half hour. I

First Holiday after Divorce: 8 Tips for Surviving It Solo

There’s nothing like the holidays to make a newly divorced or separated person feel disconnected and lonely. Everywhere you turn, you’re reminded of your new status. Your friends are spending Thanksgiving “just with family.” Holiday cards featuring perfect-looking parents and children appear in your mailbox and your Facebook newsfeed is overflowing with happy, smiling couples and families. You watch a commercial for “It’s A Wonderful Life” and burst into tears. You may feel alone in this but in reality, you’re far from it! According to the 2017 U.S. Census report, 110.6 million American adults aged 18 and older are single. That’s a whopping 42.5% of the population. So give yourself an early holiday gift and let go of your self-consciousness. Instead, start thinking of ways to make the most out of this holiday season. Here are some suggestions to get you started. Stay busy . Unstructured time is the enemy of the newly divorced person especially if your kids are spending the holi

6 Tips to Get More Holiday Time with Your Kids

Divorce changes your kid’s lifestyle, especially during the holidays, as it requires you to share your kids. If a parenting schedule is made and this year the kids will be spending the holidays with the other parent, you may be wondering if there’s any possible way to still see your kids this holiday season. The answer for most co-parents is: yes! Here are six practical tips to help you negotiate contact time with your kids during Christmas, Hanukkah and other events during this special time of year.   1. Respectfully Ask for More Time: Before the holidays, ask the other parent which day he/she is celebrating either Christmas eve or Christmas day and come to an agreement which day he/she will let you celebrate with your kids. You may be surprised how willing he/she is to accommodate if you just communicate with your request for more time, especially if you are polite, respectful, and can convey that it is in the children’s best interest for this to take place. 2. Take adv

Children Speak Out: How They Feel About Divorce

As you go through your divorce, be open with your children. This means talking to them about what’s happening, but it also means asking your kids how they feel and what they want out of their new family. Some of the issues of divorce are too advanced for some children to understand, and there are some needs that are too advanced for a child to articulate. The following 10 items are examples of what all kids want you to know, but may not be able to say to you. 1. We love and need both of you. 2. We are not your messengers. If you have something to say to my other parent, tell them yourself. 3. We know you are hurting, scared, and upset. So are we. 4. We know you are probably doing the best you can. So are we. 5. Please don’t say bad things about my other parent. It makes us feel really bad. 6. Please don’t ask us to choose sides. That’s not fair. 7. Don’t make us feel we are being disloyal because we enjoy being with our other parent. 8. Th