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6 Tips to Get More Holiday Time with Your Kids


Divorce changes your kid’s lifestyle, especially during the holidays, as it requires you to share your kids. If a parenting schedule is made and this year the kids will be spending the holidays with the other parent, you may be wondering if there’s any possible way to still see your kids this holiday season. The answer for most co-parents is: yes! Here are six practical tips to help you negotiate contact time with your kids during Christmas, Hanukkah and other events during this special time of year.  

1. Respectfully Ask for More Time: Before the holidays, ask the other parent which day he/she is celebrating either Christmas eve or Christmas day and come to an agreement which day he/she will let you celebrate with your kids. You may be surprised how willing he/she is to accommodate if you just communicate with your request for more time, especially if you are polite, respectful, and can convey that it is in the children’s best interest for this to take place.

2. Take advantage to offer to help with the kids. The holidays are a busy time, especially when you have kids. Extend a helping hand by offering to watch the kids so the other parent can do things like go holiday shopping or attend the office holiday party. Let them know that you will save them money by not getting a babysitter. If he/she does takes you up on your offer, make it a special night for the kids by watching a holiday movie together or baking special holiday treats.

3. Plan a special and enjoyable day. If you don’t get as much time as you wanted for the holidays with your kids. Ask the other parent if is possible to get a day with them, but first make sure that he/she doesn’t already have plans that day.  Make sure the day you have plan will be enjoyable for your kids — such as going to see special holiday festivities happening in your town, having an annual cookie bake get together with good friends or some of the children’s relatives. It will be more persuasive if the event is on for a limited time such as seeing a specific holiday movie.

4. Offer to pick-up your children. The other parent may offer to pick up the children from an activity or holiday event that you otherwise didn’t have to. Take that time to ask the other parent for consent to take the children out for pizza or ice cream for an hour before dropping the children off.

5. Offer to host a “sleep over”. This may work really well if the other parent is planning on ringing in the new year at a party. Tell the other parent to enjoy a well-deserved “night off” by letting you host a sleepover at your house, where your children can invite a friend.

6. Keep the other parent updated and inform. Give the gift of communication! Even though you are not in the same room, of course, a phone call or face-time are still meaningful ways of staying connected. Offer a simple holiday call from the kids on Christmas eve or day.


Have questions about your child custody arrangements? Not quite sure about how to share parenting time over the holidays? Are visitation exchanges tense? We can help. For answers to these questions and more, please the law firm of Dianne Drew Butler & Associates, Inc. at 209.478.0840 to schedule your attorney consultation.

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