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Parenting Through The Do’s and Don’ts of Divorce

The Do’s of  Parenting During Divorce

  • Encourage the kids to speak about their feelings.
  • Tell your children that the divorce was not because of them.
  • When your kids are angry, understand where they are coming from. Fear, anger, and sadness are common feelings for kids dealing with divorce.
  • Explain what divorce means and tailor the message to their age and maturity.
  • Keep your kids updated on changes and events, including a move, activities, and visits with family members.
  • Continue to enforce rules that were in place before the split. It’s best to stay consistent, even if your spouse is not. A stable home environment is the goal.
  • Make time for your kids every day, even if it’s only a phone call.
  •   Work with the other parent to protect the kids from the conflict.
  • For children who have a hard time adjusting, seek the help of a family therapist.


The Don’ts of Parenting During Divorce

  • Don't blame anyone for the divorce.
  • Don’t be negative; speak positively about your former spouse.
  • Never ask your child to take sides with you.
  • Don’t play games. Communicate with the other parent instead of asking your child to send messages.
  • Don’t stress out your child. Keep him or her protected from bad news they don’t need to hear.
  • Don’t treat your child like a friend; be a parent.
  • Don’t discourage your child from having a relationship with the other parent or step-parent.
  • Don’t over promise. Set realistic expectations for your kids that include spending time with them as much as possible.
  • Don’t underestimate the importance of “I love you.” Tell them every day.






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